Our favorite Frankie is just as surprised as us that he wound up on episode 230. We guess it's just our shared history that makes him feel obligated to appear on our show, despite becoming the world's most eccentric billionaire/villain/oil baron. And we don't take the label "most eccentric billionaire" lightly, especially not these days!
You might have originally been thinking Frankie was referring to the teletransportation paradox, but he wasn't! He probably meant The Transporter Paradox, whereby Jason Statham transports humans between destinations so quickly, they appear to arrive at their destination BEFORE they even left! Maybe we'll have to ask Mr. Statham himself about it on a future episode? We're sure Frankie can connect us!
The Merry Marvel Movie March is back, baby... with a movie we initially decided to skip! That's right, it's time for that appendix to the March that we always threatened you with, and we kick it off with 1985's Red Sonja. But don't worry, it's right back to the regular MMMM for the next installment, so you'll have perhaps YEARS to wait for the next Appendix entry!
No, Kevin was not crazy: that character was pretty amped up about swordfighting.
Despite the title and description of episode 228, this is primarily an episode where we do taste tests. So why do we talk so much about churros, and yet we've never eaten a churro on the podcast? Dare we consider a segment called "Churro with Charlie"? It's too well named to not exist!
Now you too can learn about Dewitt's best-loved tortilla-based school lunch item!
And behold: (mostly AI-generated) Churro Art!
All of our mitigating forces (a.k.a guests) are absent in episode 227. Of course that means that the podcast format has completely changed. We're rebranding as Frasier vs Frasier, a podcast comparing episodes of the classic TV sitcom Frasier against the new reboot, specifically through the lens of Kelsey Grammar's dubious political views. (We're assuming this was Tony's "monkey's paw" wish.)
Wow, "Gobob vs Snowjob" was over 11 years ago! Now that's a callback!
Since the days of the TV show Lost, J.J. Abrams has been well known for his surprising, yet baffling reveals. Here's his most recent!
Even Charlie is beginning to regret his adoption of streaming over physical media after the most recent apocalyptic event in entertainment. Oh well, movies and TV were great while they lasted, but 100+ years was a pretty good run!
A lot has changed in 15 years, but we just keep the episodes coming, as episode 225 proves! (Wait, 15×15=225...is THAT why Adam insisted the 15th anniversary episode be #225?) Of course tonight, we will all be eating our own individual buckets of spaghetti in honor of the occasion. Wait, there's a restaurant that already sells that? Guess we won't have to get out the hose to spray down our own Lowe's buckets!
The Ypsilanti Water Tower continues to fascinate and attract all sorts of curious tourists. Or so we're told!
The Count: Censored. Now you are aware.
If you listened to the episode, you know about Terriers, Andy Barker, P.I., and the elusive phenomenon that is Ed. Hollywood is officially on notice that we want all of these shows BACK for more seasons, regardless of talent availability! You must cater to our specific interests! [Note to Hollywood: we'll also settle for an arrangement that lets us see Ed again.]
Episode 226 coins the term "freedom meal", a term we can't believe didn't already exist. What's YOUR freedom meal? No judgement! We'll make sure to relate the results on the show at some point, anonymously if requested.
(And no, you didn't miss episode 225; Adam just insisted that this be episode 226, even though it's the one after 224. I don't understand either, but presumably he'll one day make it clear to us why this was so important to him.)
This episode we learned about a musical sequence from Blues Brothers 2000 and secret character names in Interstellar and the Star Wars universe. Plus the origins of...Jizz music. Truly an enlightening episode!
Now that we've progressed in earnest through a large chunk of the Merry Marvel Movie March so far, we decided to take stock in episode 224. We drop the veil slightly because we've reached such a huge milestone, but not enough that Charlie will admit he likes shields, or that Doug will admit that any opinion he's ever had was wrong.
Doug compiled some stats, which was super awesome of him! Some of note:
As it turns out, not every celebrity keeps up with every meme adjacent to work they participated in. We know, disappointing isn't it?
What we can't really call "Phase 1" of our Merry Marvel Movie March draws to a close (maybe "Merry Marvel Movie March Module 1" instead?), as we review The New Mutants, a film that somehow got a 2020 theatrical release, despite, y'know, everything.
The end of this first part of the March means we'll be taking a short break while Phase 4 of the MCU finishes up in November (so that we can sagely and holistically look at all the Phase 4 movies and go, "Yeah, they weren't really building to anything, were they?"), but that doesn't mean we won't go back and start our Merry Marvel Movie March Addendum. Or maybe we won't! Depends how many "special guests" show up while Paul is in the bathroom.
You may be shocked to learn that we've got some more taste tests for you in this episode, so you should make sure to read the reference material. Of course there are required readings for ephemeral pop flavors; we take these things very seriously here at GWR.
We've got "2" many "2"-riffic clips "2" give you here on "2"-sday, August "2", "2"0"2""2" in episode 222! It's "2"-tally "2"-mendous and not at all "2" labored a pun (even if we did delay it a day to add a couple extra 2s)! And yet, perhaps not our most two-centric episode? That's what happens when you set the bar so high!
Some quick hits for you to help explain bits of the episode, as always:
Installment 70 of our Merry Marvel Movie March is a review of Spider-Man: Far From Home, the final pre-COVID Marvel release. Even though we still have a lot of questions about "The Blip" (including what happened to people who were in airplanes when they reappeared...), this movie doesn't seem to be too interested in that. Which is OK! Killer drones and European sightseeing is more than enough for us!
Will Charlie hate S.W.O.R.D. as much as he hates S.H.I.E.L.D.? It remains to be seen. But it seems almost impossible at this point. (And was it even S.W.O.R.D. in the movie? Adam thought so, but the internet disagrees!)
While Doug did throw some updated references into the podcast that were eventually cut ("Zendaya is Meechee"), the ones that stay in may need some explanatory links for all the Zoomers out there. Case in point.
Even though Charlie roundly refused to participate, this year's Shenaniganza went off without a hitch, as we discuss in episode 220. Well, actually there were more hitches than usual. But, hey, three out of four people being COVID-free ain't bad (when compared to the national average).
The gang regrets forgetting to mention one of the most enduring bits, which involved Paul moving into Adam's library full-time and declaring squatters' rights. I guess he liked it in there? As with most things Shenaniganza, it was a hilarious bit that you probably had to be present for in order to appreciate.
Century eggs require patience that we don't really possess. Better to just drink all the available Mountain Dew flavors. Or in Doug's case, buy them and forget about them.
The board game Evolution has that Fat Tissue card which seemed to get Paul all riled up. And who can blame him!
And finally, AI's best attempt at creating Tony and Paul's bowling alley:
Just when you think there isn't enough Joe Piscopo-related material for an entire episode, you reach back a few years into the crime blotter and pull out episode 219. Will our latest Piscopo Day celebrity be a Piscopony or a Piscobrony this year? Much like seasoned interviewer Tom Snyder, you'll just have to listen.
Oh yeah, in case you don't remember (or never knew) who Tom Snyder, Linda Ellerbee and Edwin Newman are, we've got you covered. Be warned: this information will only be important to know for this one episode, but it may take up space in your brain forever. Decide if it's worth it before clicking the links!
While the baby name Arliss did enjoy a slight uptick in the '90s associated with the TV show (presumably), it looks like it's once again making a comeback. Of course, if you don't use dollar signs for S's then you've named your child after the character, not the show, so someone will have to analyze that data to determine the true Arli$$ bump. Another fun fact: the title of the show is spelled wrong on the official HBO website.
Finally, another episode with Doug as the only guest! And no one came with topics! But as usual, everything works out just fine in episode 218.
Star Trek: The Next Generation actually premiered when Adam was 5 years old, not 4. So please, STOP SENDING CORRECTIONS! Our email box is nearly full on this one and if you keep sending them, we will never get other potentially critical corrections to the podcast!
Turns out that even if you DO live in the Midwest, you probably don't know what Blue Moon ice cream really is.
And here's that Lightyear meme Doug was talking about.
It's hard to believe we're reviewing our *fourth* Men in Black movie in installment 69 of our Merry Marvel Movie March: Men in Black: International. For a franchise that has the whole universe open for exploration, it's a little weird to have so much centered in, say, Paris. [Hey, it's MiB: International, not Interplanetary, Interstellar, or Intergalactic. –Editor Adam] Still, as a movie that in part pays homage to James Bond, it would perhaps be uncharacteristic to travel to space (Moonraker notwithstanding).
As bizarre as a 21 Jump Street/Men in Black crossover sounds, it would likely have been much more entertaining than what we got. And if nothing else, maybe it would have been a smoother production than the finished product. [On the other hand, it's not like Solo was a cakewalk with the Lord and Miller team. –Adam again]
Bad things are happening in the world, and we touch on almost all of them in episode 216. Elon Musk buying Twitter, unusual Dew flavors, and apparently a new strain of toilet-destroying COVID would be enough to turn us into ranting doomsday preppers, but... those MAGICIANS. We finally get it; the end IS nigh. Who knew?
Unlike the actors in Dark Phoenix, we try not to sound bored in the 68th installment of our Merry Marvel Movie March, a.k.a. episode 215. To be fair, our conversation is much more entertaining than the movie itself. But at least we have a better X-Men film to look forward to with... *voice raises an octave* New Mutants?
Adam wasn't lying, Simon Kinberg did own the failure of the movie. Well, sort of. But hey, if he's happy with it then at least somebody is, right?
The Nerdist thinks the best adaptation of the Dark Phoenix story happened in the 90s cartoon, partly because the show also took the time to separately adapt the Phoenix Saga rather than shoehorn it into the first 20 minutes of a Dark Phoenix movie. We wish we could agree or disagree, but, alas, the March doesn't take TV episodes into consideration, no matter how much Disney+ might try to convince us otherwise.
And here's your chance to learn about the rich history of the D'bari race that the movie just completely ignored!
Whether or not we have a set agenda for a recording, we always come up with some fun topics, and episode 214 is no exception. Be on the lookout for our upcoming sketch comedy show based only on casual dining situations, streaming exclusively on Seeso!
Here's the "14 beers at Chili's" meme, which is also the blog photo! And as long as we're talking casual dining, here's all the info you probably want about Kewpee Burger. And as long as we're talking about memes, don't (ever) forget about Cheezburger.com.
Even though Avengers: Endgame seems like a natural place to end the MCU portion of our Merry Marvel Movie March, we all know better by now. It's a burden that our children and our children's children will have to bear as well, as eventually every Marvel character ever introduced will have their own movie or Disney+ show. Thus, we look forward to the inevitable Obnoxio the Clown film.
Disney loves nothing more than to pat itself on the back while maintaining the bottom line. Case in point.
Turns out Kevin Feige is a Star Trek fan. This was a surprise to exactly no one.
We assume you are some type of nerd if you are listening to our podcast, but you may be an engineering nerd and not even know it. Behold: Practical Engineering!
And no, your eyes didn't deceive you: that was indeed Howard the Duck in the background during the climactic battle.
Installment 66 of our Merry Marvel Movie March brings us to the eminently enjoyable 2019 film Captain Marvel. We're nearing the end of Phase 3 of the MCU, so hang tight as we continue Merry Marvel Movie March Madness into our next episode this month!
In case you've forgotten Boss Nass, he's the guy who vigorously shakes his head back and forth, presumably spraying slobber on everyone in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace. That's how you remember him too, right?
Carol Danvers smashing into the Blockbuster store is indeed the first scene in the trailer for Captain Marvel.
We had some arguments offline about whether Sam Jackson's fingerprint-tape trick would actually work or not as shown. But we can all agree that it works comedically, so we're glad it was successful!
Unicorn Store was one of those movies that just showed up on Netflix and then no one really talked about again. Except for Brianne! And it is a solid, very fun movie, so check it out!
Happy Super Tuesday! That's what we were calling 2/2/22, right? We mean, we've got a whole episode about it so it better not mean anything else!
There is evidence that Doug may have been right in his pronunciation of the "Tal" in Tal Bachman. But Adam was only willing to dive down the rabbit hole so far for answers, so we still rate this as "Inconclusive".
If you're someone who wants your music library to reflect, we dunno, music you actually want to listen to? You can remove "Songs of Innocence" from your iTunes account, but it may involve talking to an actual person. Of course, as we determined in the episode, U2 fans are so lazy they wouldn't go to the trouble!
And as we also discuss in the episode, the Nintendo eShop for Wii U and 3DS is closing. Plan (and spend) accordingly! Also worth noting that it turns out Ace Attorney: Spirit of Justice does in fact have DLC; you need to start the game before the option to purchase it shows up on the main menu, however.
Happy Valentine's Day! We celebrate with the latest installment of our Merry Marvel Movie March, talking about 2018's Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse! It's the most romantic animated movie in our March yet!
Paul mentions Red Notice, a Netflix original movie that's somehow the most popular movie of all time – at least if you're willing to put complete faith in Netflix's self-reporting of viewing numbers. But Adam did catch his father-in-law watching it, so who knows!
And speaking of passing mentions, Adam namedrops Kirby Krackle, which is the term for those black dots that show up in both comics and in this movie. There's some history here if you want to learn more.
Sorry, other Marvel songs, Spidey-Bells has stolen our hearts (well, except for Paul, who remains true to "Home of the Brave" from the 1990 Captain America movie). It's part of A Very Spidey Christmas, which you can listen to by clicking that link right there. Because nothing says Valentine's Day like parodies of Christmas songs played out of season!
Episode 209 is sure to be looked back upon as the beginning of the end of reality as we know it. Of course, that's to be expected whenever we talk to our favorite celebrity oil/tech baron!
On the subject of candy, the HersheyLand website will answer all your questions, creepy or otherwise. And here's a piece on the green M&M, because it's important that people have vocal opinions about everything all the time.
DaBaby's homophobic comments: a subject on which everyone also has an opinion, but probably more worth discussing.
We're pretty sure Food Court does not exist, and that this IMDb entry is simply a placeholder to keep others from using the name. But too bad, the name has been used appropriately anyway to entertaining effect.
And a reminder that "Nightman" is sometimes the actual answer.
Everyone knows that Christmas Day begins on December 25 each year. But did you know that it doesn't end until Adam and Charlie release an episode recounting their gifts? Just be glad that it lasted less than a month this year!
We didn't Photoshop that blog photo: you can actually buy those Jimmy Fallon cards online. Limit 50 per credit card (more than that and the purchase will be flagged as suspicious by the credit card company).
Even if Bill Knapp's is gone as a restaurant, the Bill Knapp's name lives on as an outlet bakery in Saline, MI. Oh, and maybe the name lives on, like, through the actual family too. That's always a possibility.
Mickey Mouse tried to commit suicide back in the 30's, as we're pretty sure we've mentioned before. We're glad he didn't though! Just think of all the IP we would have been robbed of over the years!
It's fair to say that the next movie in our Merry Marvel Movie March is refreshingly different from the MCU fare that we've been watching recently – but that's not necessarily a good thing. We're of course talking about 2018's Venom in episode 207. It's the most difficult movie for us to rate so far!
How do you pronounce "symbiote"? Leave it to the cast of Venom to muddy the waters.
Though Charles Rocket's career would lead you to believe that there is no salvation after dropping an F-bomb on Saturday Night Live, Jenny Slate has had reasonable success since her slip-up. And there is a long, storied history of the word's use on the show, with varying punitive action taken. It may be a few centuries before we have enough data to say anything definitive. Of course, by then, SNL will be written by robots, for robots, and occasionally hosted by Alec Baldwin.
[Editor's note: As is tradition here at the Gobeski/Wallace Report, we've taken the holiday season off from podcasting. Instead, we bring you an episode from a different podcast -- and this time Charlie was a guest star on it! We'll let them take it from here...]
Hi fellow Butt Enthusiasts! They said it could never happen, but here we are with episode 8 of Butt Stuff and we still haven't been canceled. Lance says the "wake up police" are always trying to do this, but I guess our ratings are good enough for now!
Here is a link defining Christmas in case you are not familiar with the holiday. This is another thing Lance is always saying they are trying to cancel, but we hope that spreading the word about this magical day will raise awareness and understanding!
Also I don't think you can find our Butt Logs via the web from Gogle. Here is (genuinely) the first search result for "butt logs" which discusses butt quality, butt rot, and butt swell (which is considered a defect, though I've always been a fan).
And a special thanks to the LumberJaXXX establishment and eatery, although I cannot find that internet website either. But here is the song they play every night there though.
We don't make comments about seemingly unrelated Marvel characters during the podcast without proper reference material. To that end, read about Sentry.
The Quantum Realm works because... it just does. It may be based on the Microverse, which explains some things but not others. Man, if Charlie can "just go with it", why are you asking questions anyway??
If you're interested in seeing the completely digital end-credit sequence from Ant-Man and the Wasp again, you can do so here.
Last updated: November 21, 2022